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一篇作文sep sunday sunnyIt's very fine,today.so there was a outd

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一篇作文
sep sunday sunny
It's very fine,today.so there was a outdoor activity.Firstly,we went to the park by school bus at 7:20 p.m.And at 9:30,we arrived at the destination.Secondly.we were swimming,it's so nice.Because swimming is my favorite sport.After lunch,had a good rest and we told stories by English.Finally,in park,we took photos each other.About 5:30,we still took school bus to go home.What a good day!有错吗
we arrived at the destination at 9.30
After lunch ,we told stories by English while having a good rest
Finally,we took photos each other in park
这样有语病吗 就是把其中的几个句子稍作改动了
怎么修改更好 容易得分
一篇作文sep sunday sunnyIt's very fine,today.so there was a outd
Sep Sunday sunny
It's fine today,so we had an outdoor activity.Firstly,we went to the park by school bus at 7:20 p.m.And at 9:30,we arrived at the destination.Secondly.we were swimming,it was so nice,because swimming is my favorite sport.After lunch,we had a good rest and we told stories in English.Finally,in the park,we took photos .About 5:30,we still took the school bus to go home.What a good day!we arrived at the destination at 9.30