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帮这篇托福作文评分(限时写出的)打分以及评价.

来源:学生作业帮 编辑:搜搜考试网作业帮 分类:综合作业 时间:2024/06/28 20:00:05
帮这篇托福作文评分(限时写出的)打分以及评价.
The recent years have seen the dramatic technology promotion in all walks of life,during which computer become an essential part of our daily life.We become more and more rely to the computer even with our work.Some people prefer telecommuting with their computer,while others prefer working in an office like the traditional way.As far as I concern,I prefer working in an office for the advantages of working in an office ourweighs the advantages of telecommuting.
Working in an office is better for my health.Although being a commuter to go to work always seems kind of suffer for me,I still think go to work everyday is a good exercise.Everyday I have to get up early and run to the bus station to catch the bus,it is seemingly annoying,however,my physical health has been improved a lot during being a commuter.I have formed a lot of good habits like getting up early and do some running in the morning.On the contrary,if a work at home and communicate with the office using the computer,it will be great harmful to me,say,I may get up late and lacks exercise then being really fat due to stay at home all day,my eyes will be badly damage too,most seriously,the radiation emitted by the computer may cause cancer.
In addition,I can make many friends and at the same time improve some abilities through working in an office.Go to work in an office will meet my workmates,it is really a good chance to communicate with them,since communication face-to-face plays an important role in forming freindship.When dealing some issues in an office,I can cooperate with my workmates meanwhile improve my ability to do team work.However,if I just being a telecommuting,my only "workmates" will be the friendless computer.That's seems too sad for me.
Inevitably,telecommuting also have advantages,say,it will provide me private space to work,no one else can bother me when I am working.I can enjoy my personal space and think deeply.
In conclusion,since the two advantages of working in an office ourweighs the advantages of telecommuting,I prefer working in an office.
帮这篇托福作文评分(限时写出的)打分以及评价.
看起来对托福作文已经很熟练了 限时写这样不错了 观点明确 结构了然 outweigh 拼错了,词汇上还有进步空间 应体现词汇的多变性 再练练很有可能到5分